..throw me a line ''coz I'm slipping"

Why dose everything have to change. Why don’t I know my own little neish in the way of things. Why do my friends suddenly feel like strangers, my strangers like friend. Why am I scared to hang with people I trust? Why being the biggest person in a room do I try to pretend I'm the smallest? Is that why I’m so quiet? Why is doing homework more fun than hanging with my friends? Why is it that I didn’t know that you have a boyfriend, or I don’t know the name of half your friends? Why do I feel like my little neish is falling into a giant chasm. Why do I wish I was you? Why can’t I ask you for what I need? What do I need? Why am I part of nothing, but still everything? I’m at the surface of everything but only in the depths of my own mind, that scary place I have to avoid. Why dose that sad story I wrote seem to have a part of me inside? Am I just a pathetic tag-a-long that no one really needs around? Because if you don’t need me, why am I here, or there. Why am I here. WHY please, someone throw me a rope, because the me that was coming out of my shell is slipping back inside, and there is nothing to hold on too. I’m slipping into the depths of I don’t know where, where I want to be I couldn’t tell you but its not here, because I don’t fit.